Lessons with my granddaughter

Spent a lovely day with Hailey. We went to the Park where Hailey played on the playground, testing everything out as she traveled through the Castle playground. She asked me to help her do the monkey bars, so I lifted her up and she barely hung on the bars, so I started to ‘not lift her so high’. Of course, Hailey, sternly told me not to let go of her. This made me laugh! She realized soon after that I was just making it a little tougher for her, and she could handle it. Then she asked me to do it again!

After Hailey explored the playground she began to transform into her alter ego… Jack, the lion. She started roaring at me and clawing at me. Then, she was crawling around in the grass and sat like a large cat and… sniffed the grass. Yes! She smelled the damp grass. It was hard to hold back my laughter as I watched her.



 

1 Thessalonians 5:5 ~ You are all children of the light and children of the day. We do not belong to the night or to the darkness.
Next, we stopped by Fry’s, where we smiled and laughed as we selected flowers for friends. I believe the lady behind the counter was a little irritated. I asked her if she could get Hailey a balloon and I thought she wanted a red balloon but soon learned as she started crying because she had said that she had wanted a blue one. So I smiled at the clerk and asked her for a blue one, which she explained that it would be a few minutes and I said not a problem that we were still looking at flowers. A few minutes went by and she looked at me and asked what color and proceeded to tell me that there is a Helium shortage in Arizona. I explained that this was my granddaughter and that I would be happy to pay for the balloons. I also gave her the red balloon back because Hailey did not want it. And I told her that another child might enjoy it today. Later, in-line, with the help of Hailey's papa we shared the Red Balloon and Starbursts with the boy behind us in line and made a new friend with kindness.

At Todd’s memorial, we had quite a conversation and something I think I should share. She went right up to Todd’s memorial squatted down and placed her hands on his headstone.

She looked sad and started asking questions. My philosophy (which I learned from my mother), is to offer honest answers when the questions are asked. Most often, you don’t have to go into details and a simple answer is all that is needed to a four year old. But, my Hailey has been given the gift of love from so many family members who still mourn over Todd, that she has been asking more questions. I pray that God has guided my words wisely.    In Psalm 78:5-7 it says…to teach their children, so the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children. Then they would put their trust in God and would not forget his deeds but would keep his commands... And Hailey has missed out on some wonderful loving people, that others in her family continue to love.

When Hailey says she misses her uncle Todd I sympathize with her and tell her I do too. We smile and she thinks a bit harder and looks at me and asks me if Todd is dead. I told Hailey that Todd was sleeping; I don’t like how 'dead' sounds, so I look at her and shook my head yes as I tell her that Todd is sleeping. Hailey, with a somber face, looks down at the headstone and wipes it with her hands and looks at me again with her puzzled look.

I asked Hailey if she remembers where Jesus lives and she pointed to her heart. I smiled and told her that is where Todd is too. She then crawled on to my lap and I told her how we can remember Todd; the way he smiles, the way he played ball, and the way he helped others. I told her that my fondest memory of Todd is when I had to stand on my tip-pee toes to wrap my arms around his neck and he would bend down and whisper in my ear “I love you, mama”. And of course, this memory placed a smile on my face as Hailey stared at me. That is when I realize that she doesn’t have any memories of Todd, yet her family does. I told her that she can imagine playing with Todd, because Todd would have loved to play with her. Hailey looks up at me with a grin and asked “Really?” I said, “Yes, Really” and we laughed.

“So, he’s sleeping?” she asked. I said yes, but he won’t wake up until Jesus comes for us and he will take you to uncle Todd and we will all play together!

Hailey did shed some tears during this conversation, saying that she misses her uncle Todd. But she also saw how her grandma can smile when she thinks of this mysterious uncle. Also, when Hailey was asking if Todd was dead she also asked if all the people here were dead. This could be a delicate situation should Hailey loose someone she loves. Of course, we all hope and pray that our family will have longevity, but as we all have experienced, the unexpected comes un-expectantly. So the more we show Hailey how she can be comforted by Jesus in these life situations, the better chance she will have to gain strength, courage and wisdom to do what is right.

They say it takes a village to raise a child... well, there are many who love my granddaughter, Hailey, and we are participating in her learning of life. It is amazing what we can learn from a child and can often be heartbreaking to know some of the things they are thinking. So be wise around our children and take pride in their lives and curiosities. I know that she is watching me and I want to arm her with love, wisdom and awe...

 She is a real joy in my life!